Saddened by Virginia Tech Tragedy

First, I have to say how saddened I am about the tragedy at Virginia Tech. Just thinking about those that lost their lives, sitting in a college classroom to better their lives, hits me pretty hard. Our daughter attends college and it shouldn't be a scary thing. I know they say that there is a better chance of the moon falling to the earth than something like that happenening - but it does happen. And I don't remember the moon ever falling to the earth. So, anyways, my heart goes out to all that are suffering.

The media really needs to stop giving so much attention to these criminals. I mean, the criminals are mailing videos and pictures to news stations because they know attention will be given. Maybe if we stop watching and stop giving attention, they will soon realize that is one thing that will not come from their crime. They are given nicknames and the disturbing videos are shown on every channel. If the videos and pictures weren't shown, I wouldn't miss them. But the news stations need their viewers so they each try to outdo the other. And then there are the curious that want to see these pictures and the criminals themselves watch and get ideas of their own. In our city, two seperate school lockdowns have occured within two days. I know the attention to these crimes would never stop. It has gone on for decades and will continue for decades more. I think ALL the attention should be given to the victims, period.

Acceptance

When you were little, acceptance was all you knew. You had to accept what was given to you because you didn't know any better. You were vulnerable, just a child. You had to accept good things and bad things and you adjusted yourself for those things so that you could continue on, happily.

I have been asked some questions lately regarding my diabetes from co-workers because I attended a Customer Service Training Session which included a luncheon afterward. I didn't attend the luncheon simply because I had to go home for lunch because my daughter was getting ready to head to Florida for spring break (ahhhh!). Anyways, the co-worker I was talking to also knew I had diabetes and since the subject was food, she asked how I was doing with my diabetes. She told me she would never even think that I had it and I asked why. She told me that I never mention it and never seem down about it and she knows several other people with diabetes who have a real problem with it.

This brings me to the title of by blog, Acceptance. I was diagnosed about six years ago. My doctor very casually told me, "You have diabetes." Handed me some paperwork, told me to take these pills and check back with him in a week. I was devasted. I cried all the way home. I didn't know what to eat or what to expect at all. Fastforward to about a year after that day, when I was finally diagnosed as Type 1, I realized that this is just the way it is going to be. There is no changing this. I have to watch what I eat. I have to do these shots. I have to prick my finger ten plus times a day to watch my sugar levels. It could be worse. So, this is ALL I have to do? Yes. This is ALL I have to do. Sure, it can get in the way when I have to put a halt to everything I am doing so I can check my sugar to make sure everything is fine, but, I HAVE to. That's all there is to it. Acceptance. I have accepted it as part of my life. It is a part of me. A pretty small part actually. So, I continue on, HAPPILY.

Winter, Winter go away........

Diabetes can't really get me down, but adding onto diabetes with little things that aren't so great has got me down a little. I went to the doc yesterday and he told me something I already knew but haven't really put much thought into it. He told me I have something called Right Bundle Branch Block. Strange name....it's when the wiring in the heart is just a little different. The "electrical currents" take a different route than they normally should. He didn't want to tell me not because it's bad but because it is nothing to worry about at all and a normal healthy heart can have it as well. Soooo......I'm not worrying about it...or am I? I am a little. He is scheduling me for an ultrasoud of the heart and a stress test just to rule anything out. That's good. I don't have symptoms of anything and I only went to the cardiologist because my heart seems to have this sensation of beating really hard, especially at night. Not skipping beats or irregular or anything, just hard.

And then my husband has been home from work for the last week (thank goodness for Aflac), because he had an episode of losing vision for a split second and then a headache and dizziness. The dizziness hasn't gone away and that is why he has been home. He has been getting a bunch of different tests done from MRI's to a Carotid Artery Test. The MRI and Cat Scan have come back fine so that is good. His mom is recovering from a double bypass in a nursing home that she calls dispicable. In my opinion, any nursing home is not great but she will only be there for a week and she is doing good. Does winter bring out all the illnesses, not to mention the lazies?

I can finally see our driveway which has been hidden away under all the ice and snow. I can't wait to see the grass! With all of this going on, my sugar levels have actually been pretty good.

So, with all due respect, winter.......could you just go away?

Handy Little "free" Boxes

Does anyone keep their insulin in the boxes they came in after opening them? I do. I find it is alot easier to tell which one to grab when reaching in the fridge, at any time of the day. Even when carrying my Humalog to work and back, the box is very handy and keeps it nice and safe. I have seen the colorful pretty little vial protectors, and they seem very nice, but I just prefer the box. Especially when they are being sold for $10 a pair when it probably would take $2 to make. Don't get me wrong, they are probably very handy for kids when they carry their insulin so that it just plain looks better. I would want them if I were a kid. They are pretty cool looking. Anyways, I would forget which one I put in which color protector and I would have to keep pulling the vial out to check! Oh well...

I am tired of winter. I have the winter lazies. I have started Pilates at home with my daughter. She really motivates me to do those painful body movements three times a week now! I am up to 20 minutes at a time and hopefully, if I can keep this up, I will be up to the full 45 minutes soon! Tonight I walk my 45 minute paper route - it is just too cold for that though. I enjoy the exercise but 24 degrees.......I can do it! I might need to grab me a cup of afternoon java to get through this day. Yea, the winter lazies grab me at work too!

Scary Stuff

Okay, I admit it. I'm scared. I am so scared of a hypo that I have kept my sugars too high alot of times. Especially before bed. Even though I set my alarm for 1:30am every night, I still wonder, "Will I wake up if my sugar goes too low?", "Will I die?" Hypo unawareness really scares me. I have had diabetes for about five years now and I can still pretty much tell when my sugar is dropping but sometimes I check and it will be down to 45 and I will have had no symptoms at all. My schedule is very routine and I usually know when to check; before breakfast, then around 10am, before lunch, then around 2pm, before dinner, and then around 9pm.........it's those in-between times that get us all. I will check probably 3-4 extra times in-between just to be sure nothing "strange" is going on. The weekends are somewhat of a challenge because my normal routine is much different. More lax I guess. When I clean my house on Sundays, I can't keep my sugar up and end up drinking a sugary soda thoughout the whole day. Cleaning the house and grocery shopping are good things to do to get your sugar down!

I tried the Extend Bars a couple nights ago. My sugar was 95 before bed. I wanted to see if the nutty chalky tasting bar would level my sugars out overnight. Well, I checked again after about 45 minutes of eating it and my reading was 215! Okay, it's not supposed to give you a big spike as it says it only has 2 grams of fact acting carb. So........needles to say, I don't think those work very well for me. Dinner was nothing that would have hit me later so I contribute all the rise in sugar to the Extend Bar.